speak english...

can i speak english for one day...? 2 days ago...night,..i cannot sleep..then i brought some 'buku conteng' and i write down anything that i think and remember...and wauh...even my english is trouble for me and broken..but i think i can study more..i write down so many words even so many fault...then this day i want to told you about my self... i know that i am not perfect but do you perfect tooo?..sometimes i dont want to life or born in this world...but i know i have to grateful to my god,ALLAH because i can entry paradise if i can be a good human and righteous..but the true is...i am so weak to face a conjecture[dugaan]...i always want to be a good but so many resistance [rintangan] i have to face..and when someone humans want to die. i must help her..dont i? because i dont want her feel what i feel...no one want to hear my problem...just Allah...so i want her think that i can help her with lend my ear to hear...because i always not be her...and in my life i know that i is the one who are so weakness..and yes..i accept the reality...dont i..?..thats all i can write down some english...haha trouble right?so many offense[kesalahan]..but although little words i write..my feeling is so tired...and happy..little happy because i can write although so many offense...then bye..assalamualaikum...